Nice Horsey

You decide its time for the hospital to have some fun. You release 5 large broncos into the hospital, but make sure it is at 4 different exits of the hospital.
Hopefully, one horse will make its way to the ICU
and smash into repsirators; and just cause people to run for their lives.
Now this would be hysterical, like for example, you to turn the corner and you see old people and young running for their lives and down the hall you see a giant horse galloping.
Also to piss the horses off, brand them as you release them into the hospital.

This was the 1st VOD ever written- an oldie but this is where it all began- titled simply, "WHITE PUBES?"

You drive by a
typical hitch-hiker dude,
hippie looking, long hair,
bandana..

What you should do to him is pick up..
then chloroform his face so he is knocked out
Tie him up and throw him in the trunk
Then an hour later open up the trunk and beat him bad with a baseball
bat and cut off one of his thumbs..
then hire someone to clean him up-
cut his hair, shave him and bleach his pubic hair bright white, and buy him a new suit
Dress him up and drop him off in the same spot you picked him up at
The confusion of this mother fucker would be worth laughs for years-
he would never figure out what happened to him and the fact that his pubes are now bright white would just thrown an extra bizarre twist

HEY! Who let you in here? NURSE, SOMEBODY- HELP ME!?

Go to JARC house (jewish association for retarded citizens) and tell manager you are here to take them on a field trip..fill up a bus and bring them to the hospital..
tell them there is a million dollars in someones room..
and whoever finds it gets to keep it..
tell them to search everywhere -
and tell them a hint is to look under peoples pillows and beds..
walk them to the door and scream GO! -
maybe even follow one just to get a good laugh

Midgets ravage hospital. Claim they were duped- news at 11

you one again hire 10-20 midgets and tell them you are filming a movie

You explain the premise which centers around
one of their friends is in the hospital sick
and you have to get to your friend before the crazy doctor kills him-
you tell them the scene will be taking place at a local hospital and you drive them there--
you tell them the 1st scene will be them sprinting through the hospital knocking people over
in attempt to find their buddy--
you reassure them- that everyone in the hospital is an actor
so that even when security chases them to keep running and knockin people over--
especially old sick people, who you say are young actors with makeup on -
you tell them that is good for the comedy aspect of the movie-

the look on peoples faces when 20 midgets are barreling over people and running thru the halls would be priceless

Computer Virus

You find an add that is titled Computer Doctor.
You call up the Computer Doctor,
who specializes in repairing hardrives
and tell him you downloaded a virus and need help.

Before he gets there, you set up a really old computer
but dont even plug it in.

For added effect, you puke all over the keyboard.

When he comes to your place,
show him the computer and say,
"this lil guy has not been feeling well for quite
awhile."

When he asks if this is a joke,
ask him, "do you think this is a joke?" and slam a
potatoe sack over his head.
Then, tie a rope around it so his arms are locked down,
then roll him down a flight of stairs.

Chinese Nightmares

You hire a good friend of yours (boy or girl does not matter) to dress up with basically just a clown mask on
and only stilletos; hand them a gun.
You get a motel room and
order a huge order of chinese food for delivery.

When the delivery gets there
have them answer the door, pointing the gun
at the delivery man.
When the chinese guy freaks out, have them say, "Today is a good day to die."
Then instruct them to shoot at his knee.
You will have to run because the cops are coming,
but you will give this guy awesome nightmares forever

Good Joke Need Lots of Midgets

Using the phone book, look under midgets for hire.
Call up every single midget for hire company in the area
and have them all meet at an old ladies house.
Arrange it so all the midgets somehow come at once-
tell some of them to dress up in scary halloween costumes
and that it is for a kids birthday party.
Hordes of midgets will basically swarm
this poor old lady's house causing her to go into a complete panic.

Someone tell the old guy that is not acceptable

You go to a fancy restaurant bringing in a brief case filled with a mixture of
lettuce, ground beef, jello.

You go to the bathroom and
wait til an old guy has to use the stall.

As he goes in -
stand up in the stall next to him
and dump your brief case over his head.

Walk out holding your nose,
turn to a waitress and say
"Jesus lady someone did something nasty in there..i think the old guy has diarrhea"

Wait til he gets out- for everyones reaction- including his

Why Gfilte Fish? WHY!?

Call up the cable guy to the apartment next door
(that way you wont get in trouble)-
As you see him walking down the hallway
ask him if he would not mind helping you out for a second.
As he walks in chloroform him so he his knocked out.
Dress him up in a winnie the pooh costume-
but before you put the mask on-
duck tape his mouth shut-
then glue on the mask
so it will take a lot of work to get off-
and the movements he will make trying to get it off
will just look like Winnie the pooh is all confused
This will also muffle his screams as well.
Yank him down to to the bus station
and buy him a ticket to Oklahoma City-
Had him a bag - with these items inside

a jar of gfilte fish
a sock and
a note that reads
"Bad cable man - HBO came in fuzzy for last time"

Wedding Romp

There is a very extravagant wedding planned-

You decide to play a joke and walk up 2 horses to the entrance

The security stops you
but you explain how the bride and groom
want to ride out into the sunset and its all been planned out

You then unleash the horses into the ceremony kicking them hard and branding them so they gallop and romp all over the place-

Destroying the wedding and sending people into pure terror