NICE LIBRARIAN

Go to the library-
Wait until it's about to close, so it's you and the nice librarian left.
This is when you casually walk up to her
and tie her hands behind her back while she is still sitting.
Duct tape her to the chair so she can't get up.
Have her open up her mouth and shove a carrot in.
Write on a sheet of paper "THE LIBRARY IS EDUCATIONAL" and tape it to her shirt.

Then take 2 poloroids-
1 to leave for her
and
1 for yourself because this could be the greatest poloroid picture of all time!

Cyclops Lawn Mowing Company

You buy a cheap lawn mower and go around a random neighborhood asking if anyone needs their grass cut.
When you find your first customer, convince him to watch you from his porch, telling him how proud you are of the work you do.
You begin to work and every now and then wave to your happy customer.
After about 10 minutes- you then turn your back to him so he cant see what you are doing and slip on a Cyclops mask.
Then turn back to him and wave- this will confuse the hell out of your customer-
This is when you run the lawnmower towards him and his house and launch it through a window

He will be so freaked out you will easily be able to casually get into your car and drive away
Make sure you have on your car a peel-away sticker that says "CYCLOPS LAWN MOWING CO."

Graduation Day

Its that time of year when graduation ceremonies are taking place every weekend, so you decide its time to have some fun. You hire a team of acting midgets and tell them you need them for a Viking play. They will all need to dress up as ancient vikings, with swords and guns. You tell them the play is going to occur at the local amphitheatre, which will make sense to them when they see 100s of people sitting in the audience. You tell them all they need to do is storm the stage and act like drunken crazed vikings. You tell them the more chaos and havoc they cause the better. You also tell them this will be the end of the scene and how when the curtain falls will be the cue to stop "acting."

Also for added affect- you have one of your buddys throw a beehive from one of the back exits so when people try to flee they are greeted by a swarm of bees

Grandmas Back!

Your friends grandma dies.

He is upset, so you decide to play
a good practical joke.

When he is gone you sneak into his house
and put a casket in his living room.
In the casket you put a mask of a
scary clown inside.
Under the mask
write a note that says "Grandmas Baccckkkk"

This will freak the fuck out of your friend.
When he tells you this story
get mad
and tell him if you find out who did this you will kill them

Chuck E. Cheese Has Gone MAD!! RUN!!

You go to a Chuck E. Cheese restaurant one saturday afternoon and chloroform the guy who works as the mouse, and slip into his costume. You go out into the main dining room and act all friendly and goofy, playing with the kids, etc. When you got a huge group of kids around you point at one of the adults sitting at a table so all the kids look at him. Then pick up a chair, and launch it at the wall. Then charge the random adult and lunge at him, knocking him over his chair and just start to wail on him. Then even though Chuck E. Cheese is not supposed to talk, scream "Thats for having sex with her! You Jerk!" Run out. Everyone from the kids to the adults will be in such shock and this guys wife will be livid too.

Good morning

You live next door to an elderly couple. Every morning at 8am the husband usually dressed in a suit and tie goes to work. You decide you are gona play a joke on him so you get there early and hook up his hose to one of those pressure squirters. Wearing your old Yoda mask from halloween as soon as he closes the door of his house, douse him in water but make sure you get his face really hard and all of his clothes. Then just take off. A month later do it again. Then just in case he gets suspicious, do it 2 months after that. Then maybe even wait 6 months and do it again. This guy will never understand why someone dressed up as Yoda is bombarding him in the morning with hard cold water in his face.

HELP THE DIABETIC!

you see an old lady at the mall in a wheel chair
walk up to her and ask her if she needs assistance
then get behind her and start wheeling her as fast you can... run thru the mall
screaming "get out of the way she is a diabetic" approach some dumb looking guy
and hand her off and scream "GO GO.. im tired and she needs to get to her car..
dont listen to her .. she is delusional.. run man run!!!!" hopefully this guy
will take off wheeling her in the mall fast too.. and if a family member reports
her missing.. they will bust this guy instead

Nice Horsey

You decide its time for the hospital to have some fun. You release 5 large broncos into the hospital, but make sure it is at 4 different exits of the hospital.
Hopefully, one horse will make its way to the ICU
and smash into repsirators; and just cause people to run for their lives.
Now this would be hysterical, like for example, you to turn the corner and you see old people and young running for their lives and down the hall you see a giant horse galloping.
Also to piss the horses off, brand them as you release them into the hospital.

Someone tell the old guy that is not acceptable

You go to a fancy restaurant bringing in a brief case filled with a mixture of
lettuce, ground beef, jello.

You go to the bathroom and
wait til an old guy has to use the stall.

As he goes in -
stand up in the stall next to him
and dump your brief case over his head.

Walk out holding your nose,
turn to a waitress and say
"Jesus lady someone did something nasty in there..i think the old guy has diarrhea"

Wait til he gets out- for everyones reaction- including his

Why Gfilte Fish? WHY!?

Call up the cable guy to the apartment next door
(that way you wont get in trouble)-
As you see him walking down the hallway
ask him if he would not mind helping you out for a second.
As he walks in chloroform him so he his knocked out.
Dress him up in a winnie the pooh costume-
but before you put the mask on-
duck tape his mouth shut-
then glue on the mask
so it will take a lot of work to get off-
and the movements he will make trying to get it off
will just look like Winnie the pooh is all confused
This will also muffle his screams as well.
Yank him down to to the bus station
and buy him a ticket to Oklahoma City-
Had him a bag - with these items inside

a jar of gfilte fish
a sock and
a note that reads
"Bad cable man - HBO came in fuzzy for last time"

Wedding Romp

There is a very extravagant wedding planned-

You decide to play a joke and walk up 2 horses to the entrance

The security stops you
but you explain how the bride and groom
want to ride out into the sunset and its all been planned out

You then unleash the horses into the ceremony kicking them hard and branding them so they gallop and romp all over the place-

Destroying the wedding and sending people into pure terror